Tuesday, November 27, 2007


Wow...Where to start?? It's kind of odd how it ended for Taylor "on the field". Going down with a sprained knee in the first half against the Eagles on November 11th. The injury was not odd or strange but his exit was. Usually the player would get checked out on the field by a trainer and helped to the sideline with a fans applause. In Taylor's case he went down in the end-zone after the play was over got up after a few seconds and hobbled directly into the tunnel by himself. Most of the fans and players did not even see him leaving the field since the next play was already started when Taylor got into the tunnel. Who would know this would be the last time we would see him in the Skins uniform and on the field or more importantly lead up to the last few weeks of his life?

It definitely seemed Taylor had changed this year. In years past you would see him on the sidelines sitting by himself or standing with a kicker or punter? But this year I saw him sitting with the rest of the defensive players and actually giving high-fives to all. The players actually elected him as a "committee" member to represent them in talks with Coach Gibbs. Just when everything seems to be falling into place for him this happens.

As for my shining moment with Taylor - Outside leaving FedEx after a pre-season game 3 years ago I was able to scoot around a security guard and "accost"(basically go crazy in excitement in meeting him!)Sean on his way to his car. To my disappointment I think he was more surprised with me then I was with him not hitting me back and actually shacking my hand....maybe this guy was not so tough off the field?

Video of his first season (#36) highlights - Seems like enough plays for an entire career...

R.I.P - #36/21

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Pissed Off

I finally made it out of the rubber room after Sunday's game and am back home. 1 f-ing yard to be 6-3, 1 f-ing yard. Please put my sorry ass in the game and I will finish it off next time. I am pissed off and the Redskins better be as well so they can get a win against the Cowgirls. Typically after a loss like Sunday the Skins would do the "unthinkable" and beat Dallas in the toilet bowl of a stadium they call home. Without Taylor I think this could be tough to stop "Homo" and the passing game of the girls. Surprisingly even after the loss on Sunday most of the teams going for a wild card spot also lost meaning we are all still in this together so keep the faith Jimmy Farris is here to save the day!!

Friday, November 9, 2007

The Gibbs to English Dictionary

“Up here”: Coach’s term for the National Football League, which he apparently thinks is played at altitude. This would make more sense if Gibbs had been a longtime college coach or if he, the luring Pat Gibbs and the "grandbabies" had possibly lived below ground for the last few years like the people in 12 Monkeys.

“Hard fought”: It was a boring game littered with three and outs and field goals where the Redskins ultimately backed into a victory via some “Redskins football.”

“Redskins Football”: An approach to game management so conservative it makes Barry Goldwater’s corpse blush. You know you are watching classic “Redskins Football” when you see the following:

- A draw play on 3rd and 9 at midfield during the second half of a tie game.
- A FG attempt from the 40 on first down during overtime.
- A play action pass that is focused on a receiver only one yard past the line of scrimmage.
- 8games of regular season football without a TD pass to a WR.
- A “true Redskin”: Aging journeyman skill position player who wouldn’t make the roster of most “good” teams and lacks any discernible above average skills. And he loves Jesus. See “Thrash, James.”

- “fought our guts out”: Code for “needed overtime to barely defeat a significantly below .500 team.”

-“Super smart”: Term used to detract negative attention from a “true Redskin” who has shown a complete inability to compete “up here” due to physical shortcomings and general ineptitude. See “Brunell, Mark.”

- "Core guys": Players Snyder locked into long term deals that no other team would have approached in value and that preclude the team from ever cutting the player in question.

- "We're all in this together...we're sticking together": Only to be used after a loss. Sure, we lost by 45, but it wasn't because one or two of us sucked. We ALL suck. And you know what? That's special. And don't worry...we'll suck like that again someday soon...but gosh darn it we'll do it AS A TEAM.

- “we kept swinging out there”: Punts on top of punts. The defense spent more time on the field backpedaling than the refs did.

- “Teams”: This is the term Coach “Joe” uses to describe special teams. The irony in his leaving off the “Special” is that in his second tenure the coverage and return teams have been the only consistently above average unit on this shitwagon.

- “greatest fans in the league”: The really bitter people sitting with obstructed views behind huge cement pillars or sitting next to 5 empty seats in the club level drinking a $8 Bud Light and munching on $15 chicken fingers while their team loses to the Falcons.

- “They’re playing the best football in the league right now”: This week’s opponent.

- "We competed": We were dominated in every facet of the game from kick off to final gun.

Courtesy of - http://wheelhouse.blogspot.com/2007...dictionary.html

Sunday, November 4, 2007

A Win is a Win!

Ok I am going to make this short and sweet -

A win is a win, like "A" loss is "A" loss. It does not matter if we win by 1 or lose by 45 (like last week's debacle) it's still a win or a loss. All that we will be looking at towards the end of the season is wins and losses and today we got a Win! It was good to see the running game back and hopefully that should continue in next week's game. Thanks goodness for Suisham today and his 15 points which saved the game and possibly the season for us! At least we have already matched last seasons win total as well!

Well I guess we have seen the last of B.Loyd as a Skin. He can focus more on his music for the rest of this season. Still wondering why they brought him here and paid him the big bucks with his "league wide" known attitude problem. At least he did catch 1 TD pass while he was a Skin but it was a preseason game.

As for next week against Fat Bastard and "his drug emporium of a house" I am hoping we can continue to run the ball and pull out another win at FedEx. If the Skins can get a win next week they would be 6-3 and only be off 1 game of my game by game prediction of going 11-5 this year.

Don't forget to stop into your local Redskins store and pad the Danny's pocket this week by purchasing the NEW Captain Chaos shirt.

Hail To The 5-3 Redskins!

Friday, October 19, 2007

Redskins Slurpee!

The Simpsons and their Squishees need to move over since 7-11 is now selling a Redskin Slurpee called "Redskin Freeze" that we enjoyed last night! I decided to share the info about the new product on the Extreme Skins message board and got a kick out of some of the responses which I listed below. It looks as if some of us are still upset with the loss on Sunday.

My origonal post - "The Danny is at it again - A Redskins flavored Slurpee at 7-11 "Redskins Freeze" which is cherry flavored. Also I have seen that Lays chips have the 75th logo all of them. Enjoy"

Responses -
"Better be careful or you'll strain a groin, pull a hammy, or start dropping stuff all over the house"

"I tried to get one but the machine benched itself halfway through filling it up"

"I had a Redskin Slurpee on my lunch break yesterday. When I came back to work I was sluggish, indecisive and couldn't complete simple tasks. My boss didn't mind because we're all in it together and I tried hard".

"I drank a redskins slurpee yesterday, then i proceeded to drop the cup all over the store. Manager wasnt happy".

"I drank a Redskins slurpee. First off, I wanna say my hat's off the 7-11 owner, they've really got a heck of a good slurpee machine over there.

"From a slurpee standpoint, I don't think it was any "one" slurpee, it was really all of them together. So we're gonna do what we know best, go back and work hard, and figure out how we're gonna get another slurpee".


"Slurpees??!? SLURPEES?!?!? Don't....don't talk about SLURPEES"!

"Whoever came up with the sour apple flavor wasn't super smart".

"I went to go pay for it and I fumbled the change all over the counter. Must have had some Moss and Portis in it".

"Vinny just traded a Redskins Slurpee and a second round pick to the broncos for a ham sandwich."

Sunday, October 14, 2007

Packers Game

Heres my take and I am not waiting for the 20minute cool down period.


"He landed on his butt out there" - Gibbs on Moss

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

I'm a Swinging Soul

I was definitely worried about the Lions and their passing attack until Friday night. After watching Coach Joe's press conference and his version of a meltdown I felt pretty good that the Skins were ready for Sunday. Gibbs tried his best to have a Jim Mora moment with the reporters talking about "BALANCE, SWINGING SOULS, AND NOT BEING ABLE TO WIN A THING". I just hope he has some more of that attitude in him for the upcoming weeks as it appears it definitely wore off on the team! After the fiery interview I got a call from Lester Brody (Redskins Late Night) and he has appointed me The Associate Head Fan Coach for the remaining home games this season! My first task was to make a continuous public service announcement outside the gate to FedEx advising the fans to make sure they got their asses back into their seats after half-time as the Skins seem to always give up big drives to start the 3rd quarter when all the lame fans are trying to get their milk and cookies on the concourse level.

As for the game the Skins Defense started strong and kept it up the entire game ending with Carlos Rogers actually holding onto the ball for an INT! If the "D" line can pressure the QB like that most weeks we should be tough to beat. As for the Offense, Campbell looked really good even with the missing wide-outs. It took Uncle Al 1 full season, 3 games, and 1 bye week to figure out that Mike Sellers should be the goal-line back. We don't pay him the big bucks for nothing. Sellers also caught a nice pass and bull dozed the Lions player to the ground in the middle of the field. Talking about hits what about Taylor's hit on the Thrash's punt return! I seriously thought he had decapitated the guy and was surprised that after about 5 minutes the guy woke up and wandered to the bench alive. It was good to actually win a game that did not come down to the last 5 minutes of the game like most.

As good as Sunday was I stayed up and watched the entire Cowgirls game Monday night. All I need to say is the entire Bills coaching staff should be fired for giving that game away. What made it worse was seeing Hall of Shame, I mean Fame Crack Head, Michael Irvin jumping up and down in the box with Lypo King Jerry Jones. It made me sick watching those jerks. I am hoping the Patriots kick the crap out of Dallas this weekend and T.O goes back to his happy pills.

It's looking pretty good that Santana Moss will return this Sunday against Old Man Brett Favre and the Packers. I think the Skins need this victory to get the momentum rolling as they head into the meat of their schedule. If the D can get after Favre and their passing game as they did against the Lions the Skins will win big! Yet again though we are used to a let down game after an impressive win for the Skins. Hope this will change this Sunday.

Hail To The Redskins!

Monday, September 17, 2007

SKINS 2-0! FAT BASTARD 0-2!!!!

This just in - Skins beat Fat Bastard aka Andy Reid and are 2-0! This win was not predicted and a big surprise for me as the Skins usually struggle big time on Monday night. The play calling was very different tonight compared to most prime time games since Gibbs return. Uncle Al must have put in some hours to get away with this win and brought the whole playbook with him to the game. All I must say is I am glad the Skins have no more games left on ESPN; their coverage SUCKS and I don't want to look at fat face Charles Barkley the entire 3rd quarter. I was waiting for Thunder Dan Marley and Danny Ainge to get in the booth better yet why didn't they just bring in the Phoenix Sun's Gorilla to call the game? And as for the actual football talk it was nice to hear them talk about Fat Bastard's criminal sons for about 8 mins in the first half.

Big drive at the end of the 1st half. I am just glad the Skins QB coach Bill Lazor got things calmed down and actually gave Gibbs the blowoff sending the Offense back on the field to get 2 fall start penalties and the TD pass to Cooley! I loved seeing all those sorry ass Philly fans crying or passed out in their beer by the end of the 1st half. I can't believe the Skins actually went for the knock out punch with the long ball overthrown to Moss but it was better then in years past 3 runs for 2 yards and a punt and they should connect on the long ball during the year.

So now we must face the 0-2 Giants at Fedex on Sunday. Classic gimme game for the Skins that we seem to have problems with but we should get this one for sure!

What a great Tuesday and week this should be!

Hail to The Redkins!


Tuesday, September 11, 2007


1 down 15 to go. Yes the Skins won the opener Sunday as predicted here in a low scoring game that the Skins pulled out late. Who cares how they did it or how long it took a "W" is a "W" and we got one. We only need four more wins to match last seasons totals!

The day started early leaving Richmond about 7:30am and headed up 95 seeing a bunch of Skins fans on the way with their car flags flying. Did see one idiot Dolphin car which was in the emergency lane broken down hopefully he did not make it! Got to the FedEx parking lot about 9:30am unloaded the car and set up the tailgate. Nothing like starting the morning with a Coors Light and a few burgundy and gold jello shots.

Got to see a nice Motorized Cooler! that the guy parked next to us had which looked like a nice ride but I could probably get into a little trouble with it after a few drinks. A new issue that I have with the Danny as far as the parking lot is the major decrease in don johns. I thought maybe during the pre-season they just cut back because of less fans but after Sunday I found out quickly that was not the case. You need to walk about 100 yards to get to the "John" compared to years past when they were every 35 yards or so. The Danny is always looking for ways to cut back but now he is affecting my bladder which I won't stand for. I am thinking I might have to forget the Motorized Cooler idea and get a pickup with a "John" in the back?

Also celebrating Dad's birthday at the game we of course had to incorporate the Skins so what better then a home made Redskins cake made by Lisa? So after the food, cake, brew, and more Jello shots it was time for the stuff to be packed back up in the car and get inside for the show.

As for the game I think it was a loss for the Skins loosing Jansen for the year, but I think there are other positions in which we have less depth so I think we are lucky at least for that. Issue is that it's only week 2 and we are already having some more injury problems. Todd Wade should step right in for Jansen and hopefully the line won't miss a beat. Uncle Al's play calling actually surprised me and was a bit conservative? I don't remember seeing any of his famous wide out screens or maybe they were worried Santana would drop one of those as well? We did get to see Randle El on a reverse which was nothing but a loss since the Dolphins seemed to have been waiting for it. I was impressed with Portis for sure and a bit surprised with his hard running. One player I was not impressed by was B.Lloyd. He did not look too happy between plays/series on the sidelines and did not make much of an effort on that "Int" in the end zone. Maybe this is why another receiver was brought in today; guess we will wait and see on that? As for the "D" I was expecting a lot more blitzing then I saw maybe Williams did not want to show much this early? Or maybe he could not risk it with Smoot getting abused on the field and dropping a big "Int" late in the game. I still think Shawn Springs could be traded and that is the reason they are keeping his reps down to prevent injury in hopes a team will be calling and offering up something good. The way Smoot and Rogers played last weekend I am not so sure that Springs should be traded. I have a feeling the coaches/management are still upset with him for being the possible ESPN Rat last year and not negotiating a more cap friendly salary in the offseason. Just my theory though.

Another take away from the game is it appears that the Funky 4 are no longer! No appearances at least for them during the pre-season nor on Sunday.

Big game Monday night in Philly! This will be a good test since the Eagles should be mad about losing to the Packers last weekend. If the Skins pull this one off I might up my win count to 12 and they should be 6-0 headed into New England. One game at a time though and the Skins need to think only about the Eagles for now and their jack-ass fans.

Thursday, September 6, 2007

Adios Ade! Hello Victory or at least I hope?

The regular season is finally here and all should be feeling pretty good from what we saw during the preseason. As expected the offense did not show much due to injuries and Uncle Al's "Vanilla" liking. The "D" which wins you games late in the season looked great and more importantly stayed healthy.

As for some business the final cuts were made last weekend! FINALLY Ade Jimoh got the axe which could be a good sign. Since Ade has been on the team myself and 90,000 other Skins fans have cursed at him every home game including when he decided to flip jersey #'s to change his luck and to stop the booos. He did suprise me a bit in 2005 when he made some nice Special Team tackles late in the season, and yes even during the PLAYOFFS. I guess the coaches don't need his Special Team play now that Derrick Frost has become the leading tackler on the team during the preseason. Credit Frost for not taking his helmet off on the field (yet)and getting a 15rd penalty (Super Smart!). I am wondering who will be the new "Whipping Boy" of the team for the fans this year since there is no Ade, Archuletta, and the Kickers seem to be doing ok so far. Hopefully we won't have a stand out dumb-ass on Sunday but with the Skins you can almost count on it during the first series.

As for this weekend's game I am feeling real good about our Defense and shutting down the Dolphins; though I am a bit worried about the Offense. Chris Samuels typically does not play well against fast pass rushers and he will be going up against Jason Taylor without much work over the past month. I just hope Uncle Al actually lines Samuels up to take on Taylor and does not have Cooley blocking Taylor by himself on some crazy plays. All in all I can't imagine the Skins not winning Sunday at home but I also did not think they would lose in the opener last season against the Vikings. I know one thing and that is the Skins are 2-1 in home openers since Gibbs returned but have only averaged 13 points during these games. I think we get at least 20 on Sunday with the Defense and Special Team giving the Offense a nice short field leading the Skins to a victory!

1-0 and still on par for my predicted 11 wins this season!

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Back to FedEx or Johnny Rockets??

Returning back to FedEx for last Saturday's game against the Steelers was good. Good to be back hanging in the parking lot and getting into the stadium. Got to see first hand the Danny's modifications to the stadium for this season including multiple Johnny Rockets on the lower level concourse. The workers were even wearing the paper hats as well. First thing that actually caught my eye was the new Budweiser bottles being sold that are blue for Bud Light and red for good old Budweiser and include the Redskins 75th anniversary logo on the bottle (what a collectors item), but with all good things the Danny always does us bad.... this time he jacked the price of a beer up to $8.00 for a bottle - at least I kept it for a souvenir.

As for the game, too many Steeler fans were around or as I was calling them "dirty cole miners". Knowing this was just pre-season I knew what to expect and I am just thankful the Skins were winning most of the game so I did not have to see those stupid yellow pieces of toilet paper the Steelers fans are always waiving around. I am looking forward to the 1st regular game knowing there might be about 10 Dolphins fans in attendance and they won't be waiving TP just some tissues after the Skins "D" is done with them.

We caught a huge break with Campbell's knee only being bruised (Jesus is a Redskins fan!!), that could have ruined the entire season but that is what happens when you have a non-drafted Rookie guarding your QB's backside; so hurry back Chris. Nice to see that B. Lloyd actually does catch passes in the endzone like he was supposed to be doing all last year.

What about Derrick Frost? Punting his guts out on the field as Coach Joe would say. Maybe the team was "super smart" not bringing another punter into camp?

As for Lemar Marshall being cut today, no surprise after watching him closely miss tackles against 2nd-3rd stringers against the Steelers. I think we should have held onto him until the final cuts in case of injury since he can play all of the LB spots even if he can't tackle. I guess we will see how this goes. Speaking of non-tacklers, maybe Jesse Armstead could always come back with his gold cleats. Actually he, Lavar, and now Trotter are all available so can someone please disconnect Cerreto's phone so he won't sign them up again.

Hope to see no additional injuries in the Ravens game this weekend. Probably without Campbell, Samuels, and Portis again not much offense but expect another good half of play from the "D".

Saturday, August 11, 2007


Ok everybody call up your local Greyhound and get those bus tickets to Arizona. Skins are headed to the show!! Seriously, a win will be good for the team and I really don't think it was as bad as it looked tonight. I knew going in today without Portis, Samuels, and Lloyd the offense would not do anything. It was still good to see Campbell make some good throws and at least attempt to throw to the right receiver. As for the "D" I was expecting good things which I saw. Fletcher looked great and so did Mcintosh!

My highlights of the game were the Skins kickers with Suisman already looking in mid-season form nailing the goal post on his field goal attempt. But he did actually kick-one through the end-zone, when was the last time you saw a Skins kicker do that? He also did kick one out of bounds... As for Frosty he almost broke his neck getting down field on that one tackle, but made a good play.

What's the deal with Snyder leaving with one minute before the big TD by the "D"? I am sure he was rushing to the chopper, very classy. He should be Boooed for that one.

Forget the 0-20, we got one "W" tonight.

Enjoy a fresh "AL-Aide" tonight with the victory!

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Camp Time!

We are looking forward to camp starting Friday for the Skins. Per the coaches this camp should be a lot harder in the past so hopefully we will see better results from the start. Most importantly hopefully Gibbs can get across the press stage without falling for his first official press conference like last season (we should have known with his stumble we were doomed). Then of course who could forget the first offensive drive during last years pre-season. A great catch by B-Lloyd across the middle to keep the drive going and then possibly the play of the season - Brunell throwing a terrible pick and Portis chasing the Bengal down for a take down tackle which took Portis's shoulder out for the year. I guess the only question I have is how many carries will Portis get in the pre-season or will Gibbs even dress him? Thinking about this you don't want to get Ladell too many carries or injured in these worthless games. We might need several backs just to get through the pre-season.

The good news is everyone is healthy and is scheduled to practice as normal the first day of camp! Many players lost some weight in the off-season including Sean Taylor who is most likely trying to get into the feather weight boxing division, and most noticeable Jon Jansen. I hear they removed fat from Jansen's face to help repair his reoccurring thumb problems. I guess we will see if he can get through the first week of practice without another break.

I think we still should be very concerned with the D-Line. No changes as of yet from last year. I did hear that Tank Johnson was present at Chris Samuels B-Day Luau party last week. Not sure if this was a recruiting visit or if he was offering his firearm/ammo security for the party. Without any changes I could see this being a huge problem even with a great secondary. Marcus Washingon even on roids(??) or too much "water" can't get to the QB from the end.

With pre-season games just around the corner and the regular season games a coming we have been prepping all of the gear including my Skins golf shirts to be worn each Friday at work for the next five months. Even better news I hear the tickets are in transit via FedEx. It's like Christmas in July waiting to see what type of design will be on the tickets for each game. I just hope Tony Stewart does not spin out the Fedex man a la Daytona this year and the tickets arrive safely!

Just remember Uncle Al likes the pre-season game plans to be very "vanilla". He will save all 700 pages of that playbook for week 1 against the Dolphins!

Saturday, June 23, 2007

Another Great Purchase

Yes it has been quiet for a bit but we finally have some news to talk about from this past week. So here we go...

As if the Danny can ever take a vacation? So this week he makes another big purchase and picks up Dick Clark Productions which includes American Bandstand, Golden Globe Awards and, yes, Dick Clark's Rocking New Years Eve. I can see it now for the 2008 celebration "Danny's Rocking Redskins New Years Eve"! Move over Dick and Ryan Seacrest the show will now be hosted by Larry Michael on Redskins TV and heard on the Triple X Radio stations across the DC area (hopefully it will be clear that night so we can get more then static). I am sure the Danny will be present for the big countdown which will move away from NY City and into Landover Maryland. The Waterford glass ball will drop onto FedEx field at Midnight with the Redskins Marching Band playing for the big moment. Cerratto will be in charge of booking the rest of the music talent so don't get too excited since everything he picks STINKS. As for Coach Joe I can see him showing up in a puff of smoke on the stage at 11:59 pm ready to press the button to get the ball moving almost like Muhammad Ali lighting the torch at the Atlanta Olympics in '96. So now that this is a done deal make sure to hurry and book those hotels in Landover Maryland for the big New Years Event.

Enough with the positive press for the Danny this week. Danny did have a bad day on Thursday with the Six Flags Amusement Park accident. I am sure the Danny has already got his people taking care of this and is ready to have everyone sign waivers when they enter his amusement parks going forward. I just hope they don't require these waivers at Skins games next season as we have all had some type of injuries over the years at the FedEx compound.

And then there was Lavar and his little bike accident this week; at least he had a helmet on. I can't believe he actually was able to find one that fit his fat head? I guess he needed to hide his mug since he did not even have a bike license. Last time I heard of Lavar he was on a little "Granny" scooter pulled up in front of Congress with a bum achilles talking about his half-ass agent. I guess with the injuries from the accident Lavar will probably have to get that battery charged up on his scooter to get around for a while. What a bust and it's sad to say he was the face of the Skins franchise for all but one of his years. Looking back at it now know wonder we stunk.

As for my last report about Dale Jr and Gibbs racing well I guess I was wrong. From what I am hearing Gibbs might switch from Chevy to Toyota next year which would have caused Jr to lose interest in Gibbs racing. We are headed to the Charlotte NC area this week to tour Nascar Race shops including of course Joe Gibbs racing. Supposedly his Hall of Fame Blazer is their with his Superbowl rings and some other Skins stuff. Hope to have some good stories from the trip so stay tuned.

Only 78 days till the 1st regular game of the season but who is counting??

Having a bad day? THIS WILL CHEER YOU UP!

Monday, May 21, 2007

Junior, Gibbs Racing, Snyder, Coach Joe, #3

So early last week I hear on the radio that there was a "top secret" meeting at Snyder's home with Dale Jr. and Gibbs flying over to the Snyder residence via copter to talk about the big free agent Jr. I guess Snyder and Cerrato played this NFL offseason a little cool, calm, and collected so when they heard about this big opportunity and heard the words "free agency" even in NASCAR they had to jump right in and get the copter gassed up to help Coach Joe out. So I begin to wonder why Snyder would be helping Gibbs racing unless maybe Snyder is thinking about starting his own race team with Gibbs help or maybe even partnering with Gibbs, similar to the Roush/Fenway merger this year. I decide to post a message on the Skins message board to see what others have heard and these are some of the better responses I got.

Originally Posted by 2skins (my post)
I heard on the EITM show this morning a few people calling saying they heard that Coach Joe and Jr flew in on the Danny's copter to Danny's house for a meeting. Could we being seeing a Redskins sponsored car in NASCAR with Jr driving for Gibbs? Or do you think it's possible the The Danny could start his own race team?

"Unless earnhardt can play defensive line then i dont give a crap".

"seriously, i think maybe jr is up for a role in a snyder-tomcat movie about a former racecar driver working at one of dannys themeparks".

DH + TS + JR = IONTOP's NASCAR heaven...

"It'd be awful hard to root "against" a burgundy and gold, Skins-logo-emblazoned car, owned by Joe Gibbs and driven by the biggest Skins fan in the sport".

So today I hear on the radio that somebody spotted Chris Cooley in Charlotte at the All-Star race on Saturday night. The word was he was there to help recruit Jr to sign on to JGR. I think to myself that the Skins Beach Blitz event was happening the entire weekend in VA Beach and Cooley was slated to attend. Another fan later calls the show and says that Cooley was definitely MIA from the blitz after Friday. I later found a post with someone stating that Cooley had told them that he had to leave the blitz early to go to Charlotte to do something for Coach Gibbs????

I am just wondering if Cooley brought with him the Superbowl trophies so Dale Jr. could take a picture with them on pit road or maybe they will hold that for the press conference announcing that Jr signed with JGR. Maybe even Snyder arranged Darrell Green and Art Monk to pay a visit to the late great Dale Earnhardt to help in the recruiting process since Sr was a big Redskins fan and that is how Jr jumped on the bandwagon as well. I bet part of the contract that Snyder has proposed or worked out for Gibbs is that the Late Great Earnhardt and Jr are both immediately inducted into the Redskins Ring of Honor at FedEx.

Who looks like the bigger loser here Gibbs, Snyder, Cooley, or even Jr himself? Snyder's first thought, as always when recruiting a big free agent, is to set up a meeting with the Redskins Salary Cap Specialist. In this case he was quickly reminded that the best thing about NASCAR is there is NO salary cap. Just imagine the marketing capabilities that Snyder could throw on that car??? Six Flags, Red Zebra, Danny Rockets, Red Zone, Redskins, or even better I am waiting for the Daytona 500 paint scheme of the Danny himself on the hood of the car with DAN SNYDER written all over it.

So if it is true that Snyder does help Gibbs land Jr or gets part of the team, I hear there are already plans to build a short track around the inside of FedEx field to have a parade of Danny's cars at half-time and possibly a NASCAR race in the NFL offseason. Snyder might have a problem luring in NASCAR since he will not allow fans to bring in their own concessions. I know Jeff Gordon would like this though, he would not have to dodge as many bottles and cans during his victory lap should he win. What's next for the Danny, joining the WWE? He can take Donald Trump's spot in the next Wrestlemania.

My prediction is that Jr will definitely sign on with JGR / or a new "Snyder" team. We all know once the Danny wants something he gets it. I just hope for JGR's sake we don't get another Archuleta in Dale Jr. I am not sold yet, but I guess I might have to actually cheer for Jr a bit now if this all happens. Stay tuned....

Saturday, May 12, 2007

Guest Blogger - The Optimistic Cousin Ted

I have recently viewed Matt's predictions for 2007. 11-5? Two Questions - What are you smoking? And can I get some?

First, they will lose twice to Dallas, as usual and once each to Philly and the Giants, that's 4 losses.

Next is Dan "The Idiot" Snyder. He'll manage to overpay for some stiff who will piss off everyone in the locker room and destroy chemistry. That's good for 4 losses.

Then we've got "Norv" Saunders. Despite playing a team with the worst rushing defense in the league (remember indy last year?) he'll call 85 passes and 4 runs. 4 more losses.

Don't forget about the defense - The safeties can't cover past 10 yards, 1 loss, the corners will all get injured - 1 loss, the linebackers can't tackle - 1 loss, and the lineman can't rush the passer - 1 loss. That's 4 more losses.

Oh - I almost forgot the special teams. The punter is horrible, giving up an extra 10 yards to the opposition each punt. The kicker does the same on kickoffs. Plus he'll get hurt two games in. The coverage teams allow at least 3 td returns a year. All this adds up to another 4 losses.

Okay - where does that leave us? 4 in the division, 4 for the owner, 4 for "Norv" Saunders, 4 for the Defense, and 4 for the special teams. Looks like we're due for 0-20. I guess we'll have to include the preseason.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

11-5 Very Good

Open up that best bottle of Ballatore the Skins are going to the playoffs this season! That's right Jim Mora, I said playoffs. By going 11-5 this season, which is my prediction, the Skins will be in the playoffs. Now we can all ponder for the next 151 days until the action begins. Looking at the games seriously this is how we get to the 11-5 (being modest of course).

9/9 vs Dolphins-"W"
With a new coach and Cul-pooper at the helm how could we lose?

9/17 @ Eagles-"L"
Tough Monday Night division game, Eagles still suck.

9/23 vs Giants- "W"
No Tiki-Time in NY, Skins learn to tackle, and win big!

10/7 vs Lions- "W"
Lions have not won in DC since like 1937.

10/14 @ Packers-"W"
Taylor takes out Favre ends streak. Favre cries goodbye again.

10/21 vs Cardinals-"W"
No Denny Green, but the Cardinals still crown the Redskins asses.

10/28 @ Patriots-"L"
This one hurts but I have to be honest. Skins now 5-2

11/4 @ Jets-"W"
Big rebound game, Skins take one on the road!

11/11 vs Eagles-"W"
Skins fans throw more beer on Eagles fan. Skins win.

11/18 @ Cowboys-"L"
Skins flush one down the toilet

11/25 @ Buccaneers-"W"
Skins win again in Tampa and sink the pirate ship.

12/2 vs. Bills-"W"
Skins win after coming home from two road games.

12/6 vs. Bears-"L"
Short week and a tough home loss.

12/16 @ Giants-"L"
Defense forgets to tackle again in NY.

12/23 @ Vikings-"W"
Payback for the embarrassing lost last year.

12/30 vs. Cowboys-"W"
FedEx home crowd, last game, nothing stopping us!

I am sure Uncle Al has already got the game plan in for the first six games. I just hope another member of the coaching staff actually takes a look at his plans before the year starts. My memo to Uncle Al is - Run the damn ball before week 9 or 10 this year. And speaking of game plans I received the following email from Joe Gibbs' ministries today, kind of weird for his 1st "game plan" of the bible coming out on the day the schedule is set. I guess Gibbs has got the bible covered, Uncle Al has covered the on-field prep, and I have now set the expectations.

From - joegibbsonline.com

"Dear Matt Stnons,

We hope you're having a great week! The first off-season Game Plan, "The Bible, God's Inspired Word," is now available. You can access the Game Plan by clicking on the links below.

Study 1: The Bible, the Inspired Word of God – Week of April 12, 2007 - Video
Study 1: The Bible, the Inspired Word of God – Week of April 12, 2007 - Audio
Study 1: The Bible, the Inspired Word of God – Week of April 12, 2007 - Hard Copy

God Bless,
- The Joe Gibbs Online Team

Thursday, March 29, 2007


So we heard about a week ago that Chris Cooley was going to be in Williamsburg on Saturday, and Sunday signing autographs at a hotel/pushing the upcoming Redskins Beach Blitz event. Williamsburg, only being about forty-five minutes away, was feasible so Lisa and I make plans to drive down their to see him on Sunday.

The night before, I went into the Skins closet and pulled out some Skins clothing/shoes for both of us to wear. I also had to determine what items I wanted to take with me for Cooley to sign. I read on a Redskins message board that Cooley would sign up to three items per person! Looking around the Redskins room I decide to take with me the cover of "Game Day" magazine with Cooley pictured on the front, Cooley's official draft day cap from his draft year, and a football with other Redskin Player signatures.

We leave the house headed for the Burg at 10:30 in the morning, planning on being at the place by 11:30am to get a ticket to see Cooley starting at noon. We hear the night before there was a huge draw on Saturday so we expect to be there a while. Headed down 64 we jam out to Chris Paul's Redskins raps making the drive a bit easier. We arrive to what appears to be a pretty open parking lot with a sign for Cooley/Skins to the left and a Wedding party to the Right. Just imagine sharing the hotel with Skins fans and your wedding reception. I am sure they were happy about that. We head to the Harrison ball room where Cooley is supposed to be meeting and we are given a ticket by one of the workers which marks our place in line. We were number 817 and 818. I hear from some guys walking around that they stopped autograph signings yesterday around number 350, but they expect most people from yesterday with tickets not to come back. This could be a very long day or even worse we might not meet Cooley since he is leaving at 2:00pm.

In the room they had some Skins merchandise for sale and game worn Jerseys and used footballs. We decided to walk around and take a look at everything. Before we made our move I looked up and saw "MY BOY JIM" the manager of the Skins store in Chesterfield! Lisa and I head over to him to get the story on the store closing. He tells us they are just moving location in the mall to allow a larger retailer to have more space. The new store should be open within the month and actually be larger then the original! So excuse my comments about the Chesterfield Town Center in my prior blog. As we stand talking to Jim he points out Cooley's dad who walked past us. Jim takes a second and says hello to him and makes sure all is well. He tells us Chris and Pops just hung out at the hotel last night and stayed out of trouble. I am sure they hung out at "Pitchers" the bar in the hotel lobby a bit. I tell Jim that Lisa and I had met Cooley's ex-wife at training camp his rookie year and how much has changed since then with a chuckle. He said Christy did not make the trip with Chris. Guess it was a boys weekend.

Finally noon comes and Cooley appears on stage. He gets on the microphone and tells everyone hello and says make sure to buy up his Jersey. They start calling numbers 350-400, 400-450. We finally get our number called about 1:45 only fifteen minutes to spare. We walk up to Chris and he signs all of our stuff as Lisa snapped a few pictures. He was real nice with everyone chatting a bit with each person. I tell him to make sure to get that contract signed ASAP and he said he wished it was already done. I mention that we will be up in the 400's during the year and he says sweet!

All and all a good day, long waiting time but it could have been worse. Good free autograph opportunity and lots of Skins fans which is always good company.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

2nd Guessing...

As Skins fans we are always looking for signs of the Skins via cars, stickers, clothing etc. Always guessing between ourselves how hardcore these other Skins fans are. It is a good sign though after a 5-11 season we are still being surrounded by fellow Skins supporters with various memorabilia. Something tells me though that most of these people probably don't have a full room dedicated in their homes for the Skins, but we've all got problems and it just so happens the Redskins are ours.

The day started with us driving our burgundy SUV to the shop to get inspected. I gave my sister a call to talk about the days plans. I mentioned we were heading to get the inspection done and also joked about the new "Gold" ride we just purchased to complete our burgundy and gold fleet. There has been some doubt in the family about the true shade of gold in the new ride. I tell her the gold shade is all the maker had to offer at purchase time as it was termed "gold" on the sales packet. After we got the car inspected we had some time to kill so we head over to the mall to check out the Official Redskins Store. There are two Skins stores in the Richmond area. This is the first Redskins store in Richmond that opened about five years ago and is quite a bit larger then the store closer to our house. As we pull up in the mall parking lot we see an open spot close to the front door. As we put the car in park I look to my right as I go to climb out and in the next spot is a "GOLD" Hyundai Tuscon. At first glance it looked a pukey mustard color and I mention to Lisa to look at this crappy looking color. I then start to second guess my comment and get out of our car. I compare the two cars next to each other and all of a sudden I say, "These burgundy and gold colors together are beautiful". We start joking about the color which was not offered in the specific model that I picked and this must be a custom color. Either way the two cars accented each other terrifically. Maybe a trade in our future???

We enter the Department store to head towards the Skins store in the mall. Talking between each other about making sure we had the coupon from the Skins ticket invoice and wondering about any possible sales or new merchandise. We have become friendly with the store workers over the years and enjoy chatting with them about the team during our frequent visits. They always make sure to point out the new merchandise knowing that Lisa and I would be all over the new items and they could make a quick sale. As we get closer to the store I notice something is very wrong. The metal gates into the store from the mall walkway are pulled down, and the store looked dark. I say to Lisa, "It's gone, the Skins store is gone!" We put our faces closer to the gate and peer inside seeing nothing but empty shelves and two paper Skins posters laying on the floor and a CSN postgame live sticker across the TV cabinet that once displayed games to onlookers walking by in the mall. Just earlier this week I thought I received a great sign with the Bible from Gibbs, but now was this a new sign? And not to mention NOT a good one at all. We continued to stand questioning why the store would close and thinking that maybe they just moved down the mall a bit. I say "nah", knowing they would have a sign stating their new location if that is the case. I feel hot and pissed so we head to the food court and get a soda and take a seat. Still talking about the store closing and why? Lisa makes a good point saying the 5-11 season probably didn't help merchandise sales. I mention to Lisa that this would be the last time I head into Chesterfield Mall - my purpose is now gone. We finish our drink and head to the mall exit again passing the closed store taking another look I say again "its damn closed". I start singing outloud "As I close my eyes - all we are is dust in the wind" like Will Ferrell in Old School only this time Jim the store manager's "my boy" and Lisa tells me to shut up because people are now looking at me. I am in awe as they even took the large Skins entrance sign down, this would have been a nice addition to my Redskins room, again I say -"SHIT ON THIS PLACE!"

And the day goes on... On to our next destination I am still in disbelief over the loss to our family. I tell Lisa maybe the Danny had to close up the shop to get extra cash for the Danny Rocket's deal. So we head over to a few model homes we've been touring over the past few weekends and low and behold I head down the steps to the basement of the first house and see a Redskins wall. The wall includes an official game helmet, a Carlos Rogers framed jersey, a Superbowl pennant, and a few posters. I tell Lisa, will take the house or even better maybe she should pull the car around back and I can make a quick exit through the basement doors with memorabilia in hand - things are looking better.

We head to dinner at the local Ruby Tuesday's. We walk through the bar headed to our booth and see a very large homemade wood cut out of a Redskins helmet nicely painted in Redskins colors over the bar. On either side of the helmet I notice pictures of Gus Ferrotte in all his glory. Yes, a little outdated I know, but still a part of the Redskins history. We take a seat and are talking with Lisa's folks and enjoying our dinner. The time comes to pay and I whip out my Redskins MasterCard and hand it over to the waiter. He brings the slip and card back to me and says, "It was a pleasure swiping this beautiful card". He starts talking about his passion for the Skins and about his autographed Joe Theisman football. I mention to him our pending trip tomorrow to Williamsburg for a meeting with Captain Chaos, Chris Cooley....

Though we had a major downer today with the store closing, all in all, there were a few positive signs from the day that hope is still alive for a Redskins victorious season. I will keep my eyes open but stay tuned. Hail to the Redskins and shit on Chesterfield Town Center!

Monday, March 19, 2007

A Sign From Above!!

So a few months back, well actually January 31st to be exact, I went to joegibbsonline.com to hear about Joe's announcement of his sick grandson. The site talks about Gibbs' "game plan" on and mostly off the field. While on the site I noticed he was offering a free Joe Gibbs bible. I have purchased a few of Gibbs's success books over the last few years and have seen minor success on the field for the Skins. So now that we are in the 4th season with Gibbs, I had to step up and order one of these bibles to get the ultimate advantage from the man upstairs.

Since the time I input the order, I have gotten a few emails from Joe Gibbs Chaplain saying they received my order and were backed up a bit with getting the bibles out, but I should be receiving it shortly. Well today is March 19th and I received my Gibbs bible with a letter enclosed from Gibbs himself talking again about his "game plan"!

I think to myself after opening the bible that today is the first official day of voluntary (your ass better be there) practice at Redskin's Park. THIS IS A SIGN! I think this could be a very good year! My "game plan" is the Superbowl this year! Lets stay focused now... but you have to admit this could be more then just a coincidence.

Sunday, March 4, 2007

Numbers are Numbers

Dan Snyder has paid a bonus and given an order to Sean Taylor not to change his number for marketing purposes of the new Smoot merchandise. I am starting to think that it's not the players who want to change numbers all the time it's actually orders from the Marketing Department.

Just imagine if Snyder was not so smart then Smoot could threaten Taylor to take him to the Peoples Court and fight over the #21 stating he was the original owner after "Pion". I don't think Taylor wants to step inside another courtroom anytime soon. Taylor might consider a boxing match for the jersey similar to the fight over #26 between Portis and Ohalete, but I don't think that even Smoot would want any of this especially since he just got that jaw unwired from the car wreck. Sources are telling me before Snyder stepped in with his orders that an agreement was met to split the #21 every other game as long as Taylor agrees only to knock down/out Smoot 4 times this season in making plays on the ball.

There are 99 numbers available can't we all just get along? But has Portis said in the past about #26 "it's like Superman without his cape". The most important number to them are their salaries based on the number of digits and we all know that especially with dick, oh I meant Dock.

The only numbers that I care about are the number of "W"'s at the end of this season.

Friday, March 2, 2007

Ahoy Captain Smoot / Hit the Dock

Welcome back aboard 1st Mate Smoot, oh I meant Captain Freaky Smoot. You have some experience both on the field and on the waters from what we all know. At least the Skins will celebrate their 75th anniversary in style as we know Smoot was always game to make uniform recommendations and supply lots of spandex for everyone. I am sure he is glad to be back home as he used to say "in the burgundy and gold".

I think the real reason Smoot wants to come back is that his Captain's license was taken away for everywhere except DC. The DC Courts are so behind with their paperwork by the time they go to process the restriction of Smoot's Captain's license he will be sailing his ship into Del Boca Vista. My sources are also stating that Smoot advised his agent that his future team's home had to be near the water so the Potomac fit just fine. I hear he has already been in contact with a local marina owner and is in process of getting his boat "Lover21" transported out of storage and to the DC area.

Additionally Smoot is still responsible, as part of his community service, to promote water safety. Supposedly the Danny has agreed for the 1st game of the season to pass out Redskins colored life jackets for adults and floaties for the kids (sponsorship for this event is still needed).

Oh and as far as Dockery leaving for big bucks Buffalo. Let him go, he was a dick to me and other fans this past season in the parking lot. He did not even have the decency to acknowledge us looking through a fence when he was standing outside of his car after a big win against Dallas. He was to busy jammin' out to his tunes as seen from this self captured picture. Yes I did have a robe on and was yelling at him but come on our tickets pay your salary show a little love back. At least the Skins play the Bills at home this season. I will make sure Dockery hears me that game.

My prediction for the "dick" I mean "Dock" is he will beef back up as he was prior to this past season and lead the league or at least the AFC in false starts and holds. Maybe he can get lucky and get involved in some illegal activities and beg to come back to the Skins and Buges in a few years.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007


"Danny's Day"

Opening the mail we see an envelope postmarked from the Skins! That's right, great news were getting closer to that magic time of year. We have been on the "IR" since the last game of the season preparing again for another attempt for the return to GLORY. The envelope is opened to find the season ticket invoice. No surprises this year as we have found some in the past.

Enclosed with the invoice was a friendly letter stating the good news about the ticket price not changing, and how the Danny has only raised ticket prices 1 out of the past 6 seasons. But he has raised everything else possible including parking, concessions, merchandise, taxes, and anything else he can find. Memo to the Danny: The Skins cumulative record over the past 6 seasons has been 41 wins and 55 losses and they continue to be the 2nd highest ticket prices only cheaper then the winning Patriots. We also noticed payment for the tickets was due quite soon. I assume the Danny has to get "Redskin 1" gassed up and flying for the Free Agency season. So the suckers that we are send payment right away to fill the large pockets of the Redskins as do all other 90,000+ ticket holders as always hoping that this will be the year.

In sending payment we saw that the mailing address for payment was in Georgia? In the past payment has always been sent to FedEx Field in Maryland. Right away my guess is that the Danny is using one of his "Redzebra/Redzone" businesses for us to send payment to avoid some type of tax that Maryland was charging him to clear those payments each season. Someone deserves a raise for this idea! I am thinking next season we will probably be sending our ticket money and invoice back to India. Just imagine that experience.

Starting last season a separate line on the invoice appears for "PG County admission and amusement tax"; this really hurts. When has Fedex Field become an amusement park?? I guess when Uncle AL brought the circus offense with multiple reverses for losses and drive killers. I have not seen any elephants around but I have smelt some shit on the field many of games. Pretty soon they will have annoying men in opposition team clothes in a dunk tank outside each section with the proceeds going directly into the Danny's back pocket or I guess now Danny Rockets. Or even better maybe Cerrato can start guessing fans age or weight at the entrance cause he certainly can't pick talent.

No worries though I did get an included coupon for $10.00 off a purchase of $50.00 or more which expires 4/30/07 (prior to the new merchandise for '07 season). One request for the Danny and Skins is we authorize the use of our money to have fireworks shooting out of the lights in the upper level prior to EVERY home game this season.

Enjoy your big $ day Danny.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

About Us

We are two Redskins faithfuls who have been with the Skins through the good and bad... more of the bad lately and that is why the doctor's have suggested we express our feelings instead of holding our emotions in all the time. Just remember if lovin' the Skins is wrong, I don't want to be right.

The picture of us was taken September 11, 2006 tailgating at the season opener at Fedex Field. At the time, our hopes for a successful season were high but it was just the beginning of a year of underachievement and the season was in the "crapper" before we knew it. As all Redskins fans have learned there is always next year.

Fan Appreciation??

I know it is late, I mean early in the morning but we could not stand taking all this time to create this site and leave "NORV" #1 and only. I had to bump him so here you go.

This is a response to an article in the Post about fans being upset about the increasing price of Redskins tickets.

Well, I think Lisa and I still have a little bit of "gold" to bleed. As far as the team being the most profitable I don't have to look very far to see where all my "gold" is spent, especially with my "gold"mini Superbowl Football sitting in front of me.
The writer forgot to mention that one thing which bothered me the most is the "HUGE" fan appreciation Beach Blitz in June ..."time to give back to the fans" where not even so called tailgating outside of the event is free...not to mention watching the skills competition for $15.00. But don't worry you will have the opportunity to meet the "Red Snapper" Ethan Albright and about 15 other players that you never heard of, they are flying them all on Redskin 1 direct from NFL Europe to VA beach for the Weekend festivities. I am surprised Grammy is not on the roster of the meet and greets. I guess this so called "Blitz" is probably why I don't see the normal FREE draft day party scheduled this year, maybe that is why they decided to trade their picks away so they could cancel the free event and have another team "Fundraiser" into the Danny's back pocket.

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Norv Turner Obituary

Now that Norv has been hired in San Diego....(doomed), it made me remember my first official rant/writing about the Skins.
Hope everyone enjoys Norv's obituary -

Norv's Proudest Moment

Norv Turner
Washington Redskins Head Coach

Record 49-59-1

A man that was always on the hot seat

Some might have called him a play calling genius; others described him in words that are not appropriate to list. No matter what, Norv always broke the fan's hearts at ease. One fan said of Norv, "He was the scrooge of the Washington Redskins for eight fucking years... Thank God he is gone. Norv will also be missed greatly by the Washington Media who also knew Norv as "Mr. Excitement" because of his outrageous post-game press conferences. Norv was also praised for his great coach/player relationships that he was able to have while he was in Washington especially with his place kickers. "It's a sad day in NFL history today", said Redskins Special Teams coach Lee Charles McDaniel, "Turner should definitely be considered for the NFL Hall of Shame". The Washington Redskins announced that Turner's body will be cremated by team owner Daniel Snyder on a date still to be determined. NFL commentator John Madden on the cremation, "that's what happens when you have NONE Super Bowl rings". Turner's wife said, "Norv went peacefully", and his last words were, "We are a young football team, and we will learn a lot from this loss".

Thanks Norv for all the great memories, you will be missed by few.